Expats!  Don't Begin Dating
in Japan Without This!

Want to start dating in Japan?

Good for you!  Japanese women are gorgeous and lots of fun to boot.  So let's make sure that your dates with her stand out and keep going!

Chances are she's got other guys wanting to have her as a girlfriend too.  What can you do to step over the Japanese competition and make her choose you?

Know where to take her and have the venue work for you too. ;-)

Where Should You Take Her?

dating in japan

Take her to where the other guys can't - to a foreign venue. 

This can either be a foreign bar or restaurant…or can it?

"Can I take her to foreign restaurants?" 

Yes you can but I don't recommend taking her to an Italian restaurant.

"Why not?"

Because in Japan Italian food is so common that it doesn't she's been there too many times already (unless you're taking her to a place that's really good.)

For an even bigger and better impact - take her to foreign places that you

 • like

 • go to regularly

 • demonstrate or show something about 'you' and your culture

Another great reason to take her expat venues is that chances are she's never been to one before.

Japanese aren't very known for going to new and different places…especially alone (just look at all the Asian tour groups and you'll see what I mean.) 

This is different than from say Koreans who (in Seoul) are going more and more to foreign-influenced districts like Itaewon.

Attention! What If You've Been in Japan For A While?

In this case you might have already found some little Japanese restaurants that you enjoy going to. 

It can be that cute 'Ramen' or 'Isakaya' place.  You might even know some the owners.  For example when my friend Martin lived in Hokkaido he would take his date to the restaurants where he knew the owners.


It gave him social proof and made his date feel more comfortable with being with him.  Take advantage of this and do it too! :)

Note: I don't recommend taking her to a Japanese bar that you go to regularly…and here's why:

The owner or the patrons might shoot you down. They will probably be around your age and either out of jealousy, spite (or just their view of how the world should be) they will say something.  Whatever they say might hurt your chances with your Japanese date.

This is strange because usually you don't get much xenophobia in Japan.  Anyways...

You might be a big fan of that bar.  One time in Korea I made the mistake of taking a date to one of my favorite bars.  The reason it was a mistake is that I would go back to that bar regularly and would see her there again with either another date (or she'd catch me one which is never good.) >< 

This is less likely to happen at your routine restaurants.

One GREAT Thing About Dating in Japan

One thing you can appreciate about Japanese dating is that most elders around you will root for your cause.   In Asia elders have a lot of social power and getting their support is a big plus when it comes to dating in Japan.

This is because in Japan people believe that if you're having fun when you're young then go for it!  Your date believes this too - by the way.

If you've ever lived in Korea as I did then you can appreciate this about Japan - Many Korean elders will shoot your date down faster than Chuck Norris (and that's saying something) ;-)

After all, a young Korean woman should marry ASAP and start pumping out Korean kids.  (forgive my bias with Korea…old habit.) ><

Make Your Japanese Dating Life a Success!

The venue you take her to has a big impact on how she'll feel for you.  I admit to have made the mistake once of taking a date to McDonalds.  Needless to say she cut the date short: Her friends "called" 5 minutes later and she "had to go". (doh!)

Get a better idea of what dating a Japanese woman is like so that you can know what to expect.

Make your night a success and you'll both have a great time (you can thank me later!) ;-)

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"Dan Bloom is extremely experienced, extremely knowledgeable, and an excellent teacher. He has got a deep understanding of the whole dating process in Asian countries."

Stephen, Korea