Going on a date soon with an Asian woman? It's okay to want some dating tips for shy guys. To be frank I consider myself to be an introvert too.
The difference is that when I go on dates I know what I'm doing. That way when I'm with my Asian date she can both accept me for who I am AND I can make sure we get more intimate.
Note: When I say more 'intimate' I'm talking about intimacy both in our feelings and in the bedroom.
So how can we make sure that our date with that beautiful Asian woman can work? You have two challenges - knowing how to date and the cultural differences.
Rest easy - this dating advice for shy men will help your date go smoothly.
Do you know why you want dating tips for shy guys? It's because you're too smart for your own good.
Instead of over thinking - relax…
This is crucial!
Do you know why?
Because she's probably nervous enough for the both of you! That's right.
This is more so if you come from different cultures. After all - you're a foreign man. Chances are she's breaking her cultural norms AND what she's comfortable with by being on a date with you.
So what can you do to make her feel more comfortable? Get yourself more comfortable first.
You can do that by:
• taking her on a date to a place you naturally feel comfortable in(as long as it's not a fetish bar…the first date is too soon) ;-)
• catching yourself when you're nervous and just breathing...
• getting some gimmicks or things to talk about BEFORE the date
So this will get you started with making the whole dating experience more enjoyable for you two. Then what?
Most dating tips for shy guys involve getting your date attracted. Do they work with Asian women? And what's the 'gist' behind them working?
First of all - what your Asian date and women back home find attractive is the same. They want someone who can bring them value…enough to make them want to stick around (at least until your date is over.) ;-)
So what 'value' can you bring during the date? Well you can make her laugh. Who doesn't like a guy who's funny?
Do you know any jokes? Most Asian women like simple/silly humor. Personally I recommend using the same kind of jokes you'd use on your little sister or niece (or cousin.)
You can also tease her a little. For example at dinner when you get your drinks you can swap them.
Or if you can tell her to make a puffy face with her cheeks. When she does you can poke her cheek. That kind of silly/childish humor works best in Asia in my experience.
"How will I know she's attracted?" Your best indicator is if she's asking you questions. Most Asian women aren't as social as Western women are (on the first date anyway.)
For her to ask you questions means that she's attracted enough to you. So much so that she's willing to face her social fear and get to know you.
Granted it's not the only way to "guess-timate" if she's attracted (because that's all we can do really) but it will do for now.
So let's say she's attracted to you - what next?
The BIGGEST mistake guys make is to not dare to show any lustful feelings for their date. This is a surefire way to be sent to the 'friends zone'.
"Why don't most guys show their sexual lust for her?"
#1 - your Asian date will probably give you no indication about how she feels for you. A Western woman will more likely give you something to work with. Your Asian date will probably not.
#2 - you are scared of "messing it up". The irony is that the more you hold back from sharing your lustful feelings for her (even if you want a serious long-term relationship) the lower your chances of getting more intimate.
"Well, how do I show my 'lustful' feelings?" A way that works well is to tell her that you find her 'sexy'.
Now you don't want to tell it to her randomly. I recommend letting her know when she does or says something that you genuinely like. For example - did she tell you that she's traveled? Right after tell her that you find that sexy!
Or maybe she's poured you a drink. Tell her that you find her kindness 'sexy'. This may feel strange at first…and she may blush. That's good.
Your goal is to make sure she knows how you feel about her (which is what a woman wants a man to feel, by the way) and that you feel that way because of things she's done or values.
Try it. It will feel scary the first time (actually every time even for me) but once you've done it you'll feel great. Why? Because you genuinely feel that way and chances are so does she.
Don't worry - she won't slap you. And if she does tell her that you didn't know she had a kinky side. ;-)
Want more exclusive dating advice to make your dating life in Asia more enjoyable? Go ahead and put your first name and email in the boxes below. You'll get my most exclusive advice (and some goodies) sent straight to your inbox. Don't worry - it's all kept private.
Talk soon! ;-)
"Dan Bloom is extremely experienced, extremely knowledgeable, and an
excellent teacher. He has got a deep understanding of the whole dating
process in Asian countries."